Chris: Meanwhile, as our teams, minus some who stayed behind, have a campout while they wait for the challenge, they got the info on the upcoming enemies that can give them nightmlares.
Pinkie: FOREVER!
Pinkie Pie, you're not supposed to do that for a couple more episodes. *Ding!*
We see Chris in a room, walking as he speaks to the camera, "Our favorite 36 misfits are left and they're about to get a visit from moi in Ponyvillle..." The host stops while standing near something covered by a sheet. "But to be honest, it won't be me in person but what's under this sheet.
Gee, that won't definitely come back to bite you in the butt later. *Ding!*
We see an intro like in every seasons of Total Drama as well as 'My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic'.
Theme. *Ding!*
"Sorry, the rules state that we gotta share the bathroom, dude." Geoff said as he motions to the back of the line. "Katie and Sadie are in there."
"At the same time?!"
I think one of them jumped into the Mirror Pool and that's how the other one came to be. They're the spitting image of each other, there's no other explanation. *Ding!*
Duncan growls in annoyance and cleans up the sink area; A while later, he came downstairs as the other Magical Unicorns are eating. The folk sat down but Rarity frowns at his posture.
"Sit up straight, elbows off the table." Rarity said as she straightens Duncan out. The punk pony growls in irritation as he does as she says. "Good. Use the fork and knife, darling."
Gee, thanks, mom. *Ding!*
Geoff came over with some jam while saying, "Got the jam, dude! Ooops!" The stallion trips and sends the jelly right onto Duncan, getting him dirty.
"Duncan! You're dirty! Clean yourself off!"
"AHHHHH, BUCK THIS," Duncan screams furiously as he got off, push the table hard off to knock it and everyone else's food over to the floor then storms out of the kitchen.
There's nothing that says "fuck this sh*t I'm out" quite like a good ol' fashioned table flip. *Ding!*
Duncan: (angrily) Argh! I have had enough of this stupid girl place! I want out! Chris, if you're watching, get a tribal switch now! I can't stand it here any longer!
Well, if you don't like being in Rarity's place, I don't think there's that many places you can go to. Unless you like dirt. *Ding!*
Before Ezekiel could answer, a zoom is heard, making them and everypony look up to see some sort of Pegasus Royal Guards flying in fast. Any pony in the way quickly moves to avoid the impact like mad.
The commotion got the attention of the Mane Six, Ben, Nyx and the TD ponies, especially the Groundin' Earth Ponies who could hear the noise from where they're at at Sweet Apple Acres, causing them all to see what's the commotion's all about. As they watch, the Royal Guards lands along with the carriage that they're pulling.
"Huh. A Royal Visitor," Ben asks Twilight puzzled.
"I don't know." Twilight said, looking the way as her love. "Princess Celestia didn't send me any messages..."
Princess Celestia doesn't need to tell you every little thing, Twilight, only the really important stuff.
I mean, you're a princess yourself, you're not letting Celestia know every time you go to the bathroom or something. *Ding!*
Suddenly the carriage doors are opened as somepony got up. Most of the ponies look confused but the players look shocked as the new pony looks like Chris...except if he's a pony and his cutie mark is money and contact cutie mark.
"Hey there," 'Chris' exclaims with an eager look. "Hope you ponies don't mind me stopping by."
"Chris," Most of the ponies ask in shock and disbelief.
Beth: Okay, this is rather strange. Did Chris turn himself into a pony?
Nope, not until the sequel at least. *Ding!*
"So you must be the Chris that the new ponies spoke about." Twilight said as she comes over to introduce herself to 'Chris'. "My name is Princess Twilight Sparkle. And you are?"
"I'm Chris McColt." Chris said, making the players look at him in disbelief.
"McColt; really," Sam ask dryly and in disbelief. Is Chris for real?
He must be related to the other McColts. How he got out of his family's argument with the Hooffields, I have no idea. *Ding!*
"That's right! I decided to drop in to see how my players are doing...as well as get to the next part of their stay." Chris said into the headset, making the pony say the same thing. He turns off his headset to speak to the others. "Isn't that robot cool? He is so real life, those ponies don't even know that he is a robot!"
"Yes, it's something all right." Luna said with a nod. "And it helps meet Twilight Sparkle's demand to meet you."
"Better hope it doesn't blow up." Celestia said to Chris, warning him of the problems that may occurred should something goes wrong.
Now that you said that, it will blow up. Don't jinx it, Celestia. *Ding!*
Back in Equestria, the ponified Chris robot, which we shall call Chris McColt, gave a very odd smile as Twilight blinked. "And how can I help you in this day?"
"I'm here to... collect my fellow... citizens for something very special..." "Chris" said, smirking. "You ponies here would like the surprise...KRZT!"
The last part did not come from Chris, yet everypony else (save for the TD cast) didn't notice a thing. Twilight said, "Sore throat?"
How did nopony notice that? That just screams "robot"! *Ding!*
B: Give me an R, give me an O, give me a B; give me a 'Robot'. Because that's EXACTLY what Chris did.
Uhhh... that spelled "robrobot". *Ding!*
The "Chris" robot sighed as he said, "Fine, you made your point. Anyway, let's get down to business. As you guys know, we do have a challenge today."
"Was there ever doubt?" Gwen rolled her eyes.
"Second... wait! One of you is missing." "Chris" said as he scanned the area.
Everyone looked around and did indeed notice that someone WAS missing.
"Okay, where's Heather?" Anne Maria frowned. "Isn't she supposed to be our team captain now?"
Back at the Sparkle Library, Heather was sighing in her sleep as she was holding her stuffed cat. She yawned as she looked at the clock. She yelped as she noticed everything else was empty.
"How long was I asleep?" Heather said as she quickly put the stuffed cat back in her bag and gets up, "Honestly, why does nobody wake me when it's breakfast time?!"
Heather then ran out the door.
Wait, she slept in? That's it? I was expecting something a bit more... y'know... stuffed-caty. *Ding!*
"Second, your challenge," "Chris" coughed. "All four captains, can you step up, please?"
Gwen, Scott, B and Heather stepped up as they walked right over.
"Chris" then opened his mouth as magic spewed out and four books appeared, one going in each captain's hand.
Heather then looked over her book, "How to play the Hungarian Rhapsody Number Two?"
"That's what mine says as well." Gwen said as Scott and B nodded.
"What's this got to do with anything?" B asked.
"Your next challenge... is to play the Hungarian Rhapsody Number Two perfectly, with your teammates filming you doing the performance." Chris said. "You only have two hours to memorize the piece."
*shuffles around notes* Part of me thinks this is a reference to something. Can't put my finger on what, though. *Ding!*
Meanwhile, Rarity hums a bit as she work on some dresses. The unicorn comments, "Looks like Duncan is staying over at Sweet Apple Acres. I don't blame him. The unicorn is rather rude."
"Thank goodness for that." Courtney groans a bit while holding up a thread and needle. "I mean, I don't know why I ever saw in him in the first place. Do you have some ponies who you thought was your colt friend at first?"
"Ugh, do not remind me." Rarity scowls. "I once wanted a prince but he turns out to be a big snobby brute!"
"Really; what did he do to you?" Gwen asked, wondering what that prince did to Rarity.
"Trust me. You've never met him and you wouldn't want to." Rarity snaps in irritation. She calms down somewhat. "Still, he did improved somewhat. His aunt Celestia put a spell on him to teach him a lesson and after some problems here and there, Blueblood start to learn under Jeff the Gentle."
I'm just as confused as you are. Better go read the other stories in this verse! *Ding!* Also, Rarity is acting like she never had a thing for Trenderhoof. Then again, that one came out of nowhere, and back then Rarity acted like she never had a thing for Blueblood either. *Ding!*
"Right; That Pinkie Pie is random." Gwen said with a nod.
You have no idea. *Ding!*
Twilight was busy helping Nyx with her homework when her phone rang. The mare picks it up and listens to the other voice on the end.
"Hang on, let me check." Twilight said. She looks up to speak to the others reading or doing whatever until the challenge, "Uh, 'Ivana Bugly;' Ponies, hey; 'Ivana Bugly'!"
We interrupt Total Drama Equestria to bring you The Simpsons. *Ding!* Also, telephones exist in Equestria because it's convenient for the plot. *Ding!*
We see Ben Mare was by a tree, as he was relaxing under its shade while the sun was out. And during a little alone time, he was playing a familiar item he felt was an important treasure; the Ocarina of Time.
We interrupt Total Drama Equestria to bring you The Legend of Zelda. No seriously, I think Ben came straight out of a Zelda game. I mean, why else would his cutie mark be the Triforce? *Ding!*
"As you know, you've become the chosen wielder of the Triforce Element, correct?"
This is the mysterious 7th Element of Harmony, isn't it? *Ding!*
"I'm still lost myself, I never learn of my Cutie Mark until after I was saved by Twilight's feelings for me and the necklace I gave her, the Necklace of Eternal. It performed a miracle that I had my life again after I sacrifice myself to protect my love ones and it cured me of a curse."
But did it make you immortal? That's what I want to know. It's called the Necklace of Eternal, after all. *Ding!* Also, Necklace-Ex-Machina. *Ding!*
"Well you must have shown kindness, a caring heart for those you love to be worthy to receive it."
Last I checked, Ben doesn't have the Element of Kindness. *Ding!*
"When I received the Ocarina of Time, it holds more than magic, it holds sentinel value. From the Hero of Time, Link, and from Princess Zelda of Hyrule," Ben spoke from holding the special flute he was given from his dream state, the ocarina is more than just some powerful item; it holds something that was shared by Link and Zelda that can't be forgotten. "I believe I'm a descendant from someone of their time."
Okay, that's it. I'm done. I knew you were gonna say that.
Next you're gonna tell me you're related to Epona. *Ding!*
"My ancestor was none other than Link's Riding Companion in all his adventures, Epona."
You know, I really should learn to keep my mouth shut sometimes. *Ding!* Also, this right here completely puts your shitty backstory into question. Who knew canon could do that? *Ding!*
"Hmmm...when I held the Triforce, before becoming who I am today, I recall doing things that proved me worthy."
Wait, you held the Triforce too? This goes against all pre-existing Zelda lore! I mean, seriously! Have you even read Hyrule Historia? *Ding!*
Chris: Okay, if you wonder why we shown that, folks, the princesses insisted that we do that.
The United Pony of Goodness Universe needs to be built, after all. *Ding!*
"We're running a little reality show, Lordcan." Luna explains to Lorcan sweetly. "No need to make a fuss over it."
"Ooooh, a pet name; you two like each other," Chris teases Luna and Lorcan, making them blush slightly.
Glad you told me that was a pet name, or I would brush it off as a typo. *Ding!*
Luna: (booming) ANYTHING BETWEEN ME AND LORCAN IS NOT CHRIS'S BUSINESS!!!
Ooooh, looks like a certain somepony has a crush on a certain somedragon! *Ding!*
Lindsay: (dancing and singing) I'm smart! I'm smart! S-M-R-T! I mean, S-M-A-R-T!
We interrupt Total Drama Equestria to bring you The Simpsons. Again. *Ding!*
Lindsay: You know, I feel that Dawn and I have made quite a connection! This is so exciting; I hope we end up teaming together! (Pause as she adjusts her crown) After all, the queen demands it!
You can't be a queen, you're not evil. *Ding!*
"Excuse me, I was just..." Rarity then stopped short as she covered her eyes, "Oh, CELESTIA! CELESTIA! THIS IS HIGHLY INAPPROPRIATE!"
*Ding!*
Dakota: Have I ever told you how amazing of a boyfriend Sam is? Because he is! He's doing his best to help me get back into civilization again, after being a monster for at least two years. (Pause) Or was it a few months? Hard to say, the timeline on Total Drama is really inconsistent.
The timeline on MLP is totally inconsistent too, don't worry about it. *Ding!*
"Learning how to be human again isn't as easy as it looks..." Dakota said.
You're not a human right now, Dakota. *Ding!*
Back with the hosts, watching the cameras, Chris just gave a spit in disgust. "You just had to bring Ezekiel to his senses..."
"Watch it, or we turn you to a toad." Celestia glared at Chris.
That's not so bad. He gets a few more fungi, and an annoying voice, but that's it. *Ding!*
That was as far as Chris got before Luna used her horn and turned Chris into a yellow toad as he started croaking his rant... before stopping as he looked down at himself. Chris looked up and noticed that he was turned into a toad. Chris frowned as he croaked.
Oh, that toad. Never mind me then. *Ding!*
Pinkie: (in her seat) so you Bronies are wondering if this story and JusSonic's stories with Pinkamena run at the same time. That's not always true. That story and Golden Heart's Journey take place AFTER this and the episode with Cheese Sandwich...which didn't happen yet timeline wise so I shouldn't be talking about it. Also, ponies, the Equestria Games are coming up. Watch it on Hub and cheer on for your favorite teams! I will be the one in the pink fur coat!
And here is Pinkie Pie dropping exposition again. *Ding!* Also, the Hub doesn't exist anymore, get with the times Pinkie. *Ding!*
"Come on! A big guy like you," Dawn teases Big Mac. "I can sense an aura, especially with that of Miss Cheerilee."
I dunno, Big Mac has a bit of a thing for Marble Pie. Which is really awkward since they're kinda-but-not-really cousins. *Ding!*
"A long time; we formed 'dis club so we can help blank flanks, not a word Ah would use, look fer their cutie marks." Apple Bloom explains a bit.
"I see. But Nyx has her cutie mark."
So does Babs, yet she's still a crusader too. *Ding!*
Mike yelps as a huge stallion somehow breaks apart a tree and came over to Diamond Tiara. The one known as Maxin Talos booms, "Yes Miss Tiara?" The angry bully points to Justin, the one who got ice cream spilled all over her. The bodyguard glares as he cracks one of his hooves.
Maxin Talos must be related to Bulk Biceps. Either that or he's on steroids too. *Ding!*
We later see Geoff and Bridgette inside a barn in Sweet Apple Acres, trying to make out as Applejack and Apple Bloom came in. Apple Bloom looked curious as she asked, "What is the cowboy pony doing to that nice pony?"
The surfer girl-pony and party dude stopped as Applejack's mouth dropped, "MAH EYES!"
*Ding!*
Apple Bloom blinked as she turned to Applejack, asking, "What were they doing, Applejack?"
Applejack, wanting to avoid the question, quickly said, "Apple Bloom, yer're grounded."
"What did I do wrong?" Apple Bloom asked.
"Instead of telling you why two ponies were having sex, I'll just send you to your room." *Ding!*
We later see Geoff and Bridgette trying to initiate a make-out session near some bushes in Fluttershy's cottage... but unfortunately, Fluttershy came over and yelped.
"Oh... oh my," Fluttershy blushed infuriously. "Pardon me, I had no idea..."
C'mon you two, you do not have sex next to Fluttershy. Have some decency, please. *Ding!*
Katie: Me, Sadie, Pinkie and Izzy were planning a party after our next elimination ceremony, and we needed some streamers, just to get them!
Sadie: I love parties, especially those with great streamers and fun music! I hope there's some fun going on! EEEEE!
Basically a party with four Pinkies. Joy. *Ding!*
"Uh-oh..." Noah came in as he was holding a book. "Did you say Twilight was up in her room? Because I just saw Geoff and Bridgette coming in, with an intent to make out."
"Make out... you mean, mating?" Ben said in confusion.
"Uh, something like that?" Noah said. "In a way, these two are always... in heat, you might say."
Oh boy, this won't end well. *Ding!*
"AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!"
Everyone turned to see Twilight running out, her eyes were wide with horror. "BEN, I'M BLIND!"
Knew it. There's a time and a place for everything, you two, even sex! *Ding!*
"It's fine, it's hysterical blindness." Ben explained. "It happened to me once when I saw somebody making out in the castle. It wears off eventually.
Ben saw someone having sex before. That explains why he wasn't freaking out. *Ding!* Also, missing end quote. *Ding!*
(We then see Pinkie and Izzy dancing)
Pinkie: So you just about done with this?
Izzy: Just about!
Pinkie/Izzy: Hey-o!
What are you two doing? That's way too random, even for you. *Ding!*
"This needle pedicure whatchacallit is supposed to work."
It's called acupuncture. I'll draw it to Granny Smith being old as fuck. *Ding!*
"Ah swear, 'dat girl is going 'ta end up on de' bad side these days."
Don't worry, she gets better. *Ding!*
(We see an angry Scott, covered in messy brown stuff and a toilet seat)
Scott: (angrily) Ponies should not have to go outside!
They're not animals, you know. They have to go to the bathroom too. *Ding!*
"DUUUUUUUUNNNNCAAAAAAAAAAANNNN," Harold yelled in rage.
We interrupt Total Drama Equestria to bring you Dan Vs. *Ding!*
"Still, we got to talk about another problem."
"As in the parafried pony one?"
Remember that, back in episode 1? Yeah, I knew you didn't. *Ding!*
Twilight blinks, unsure what Lyra is talking about. She then speaks, "Yeah, we are still tight, very tight. As good friends as..."
"Lovers," Sweetie Drops ask, causing Twilight to look alarmed. "Yeah, we heard that you two are seeing a lot of each other; More than so than friends. No need to worry, it's okay to love both sides of the gender field!"
Oh sure, you wanna talk about how Twilight is in love with Princess Celestia. Let's talk about you're in love with Lyra then, Sweetie Drops! *Ding!*
"But it's okay to love both sides!" Staci insists, trying to keep her innocence. "I even saw that Universal Viewer and saw a universe where..."
This is not an Ass Pull. The Universal Viewer really exists here. Which is really just an excuse for JusSonic to do more crossovers. *Ding!*
"Can you come back to our world and host our seasons from now on?" Heather smiled, "Because I prefer YOU over Chris!"
Chris frowned as he heard it from the jar, "Hey, no picking favorites!"
Not your fault Celestia is so much better than you at your job, Chris. *Ding!*
The captains glared as Gwen said, "You know, I'm tempted to eat frog legs right now..."
Cannibalism! *Ding!*
Earth Pony Productions Presents...
The Liarjack Concerto
We interrupt Total Drama Equestria to bring you Woody Woodpecker. *Ding!*
All of a sudden, the thing ended as it started skipping. Everyone blinked.
"Wait... what the hell?" Scott blinked as he saw that the video was skipping for some weird reason.
Fillies and gentlecolts, due to circumstances beyond our control (i.e. someone was editing on a 3DS), we are unable to continue with this picture. *Ding!*
A Pegasus Story
The Pegasus Concerto
We interrupt Total Drama Equestria to bring you Tom and Jerry. *Ding!*
Izzy paused as she said, "I don't think ANYBODY is going to be doing a dramatic reading of this, since this is a pretty long episode..."
Didn't stop me from sinning this episode. *Ding!*
Unicorn Productions Presents...
Rhapsody Goth Girl
We interrupt Total Drama Equestria to bring you Looney Tunes. Yeah, you can kinda see where this is going. *Ding!*
However, before Gwen could start playing, she suddenly heard coughing. Gwen glared right at the camera as she tapped her foot, sighing. Gwen nodded as the coughing died down. She started to get ready to play again... only for the coughing to start back up. Gwen, annoyed, materialized a gun from her horn and used it to shoot the coughing person (Courtney, who was holding the camera and coughing) as the coughing died down. Gwen then tossed the gun aside as she sat down, ready to play.
Okay, that was kinda funny. Despite the fact that was taken straight out of Looney Tunes. Heck, minus one sin! *!gniD*
"Hello?" Gwen asked.
"Uh... is... uh, Megan Fahlenbock there?" Duncan's voice was heard on the phone.
"Who," Gwen blinked.
"Megan Fahlenbock..." Duncan's voice was pausing.
"Megan Fahlenbock? Never heard of her," Gwen said.
"...sorry..." Duncan's voice was heard as the phone hung up.
We interrupt Looney Tunes to bring you The Simpsons. *Ding!*
After recovering, Gwen continued playing the piece as she went to the fast portion. Gwen smirked as she lifted her hand. "Look, one hand!"
Gwen then lifted her other hand as the music was still playing. "No hands!"
This was because she was playing it with her feet.
So did these ponies suddenly become anthro for these pieces? Just for the sake of a parody? I've heard of bad writing, but this is ridiculous. *Ding!*
Alicorn Productions Presents...
Rhapsody in Ali-vets
We interrupt Total Drama Equestria to bring you Merrie Melodies. (Okay, last one, I promise!) *Ding!*
Outside the work of construction, a very late Derpy Hooves, who happened to have a second job in construction, came in late as she hung everything up and started work while banging a hammer on an elevator's rim.
Derpy Muffins has a job in construction because it's convenient for the plot. *Ding!*
Trent: (sighing) Watching Gwen being humiliated like that with that Cubby rabbit of Fluttershy's...I felt sorry for her. Hopefully, it doesn't make impact with our mistakes...
I didn't know Fluttershy had two rabbits. Where did Cubby come from? And is he related to Angel? *Ding!*
"I TOLD YOU, PONIES! MY TEACHER AND I ARE STRAIGHT!"
You're straight like a freeway! *Ding!*
"She better and this madness with Mommy and Grandma better end. Otherwise..." Nyx started angrily then she yelled out with the Royal Canterlot voice while glaring deathly at Staci, "I'LL ROAST HER BLABBERMOUTH HEAD ON A STICK!!!" Hearing this threat got Staci to huddle in fear.
Nyx has a Royal Canterlot Voice too. Yeah, it's plainfully obvious she used to be Nightmlare Moon. *Ding!*
Staci: Okay, I admit, I messed up. But they couldn't have to take it out on me, right? This is like the time when...
Pinkie: (popping in) and that's enough from you. Until next time, Bronies!
Cut it out, Pinkie! I mean, it's one thing to pop into the others' confessionals, but you don't need to address the audience too! *Ding!*
A knock came at the door. Twilight frowns, preparing to yell at the ponies thinking she is bi. But once the mare opens the door, Flash is outside.
"Oh, Flash." Ben said in relief, seeing his best friend at the door. "What brings you here?"
Flash Sentry. *Ding!*
"The princess is warning cities of Equestria to be aware of a certain individual who may be responsible for an attack on a pony not too long ago."
This will be relevant later. Everyone will have forgotten about it by then. *Ding!*
Pinkamena: (frowns) Hey, I ain't no murderer. I am a good pony, I just look this way; but can't tell ya my whole story. For more details for the story that comes after this crossover, please check out 'No Cupcakes with This Pinkie'!
Excuse me while the author shamelessly advertises himself. *Ding!*
Rarity sighs, wanting to speak to the broken lovers. She came out...and yelps as she and the Magical Unicorns got eggs thrown at them by Rainbow and Duncan throwing eggs and toilet paper.
"Ha ha ha; there's one for the road!" Duncan laughs as he and Rainbow high hoof one another and rush off.
This is not Nightmare Night, Rainbow Dash. Then again, Hearth's Warming is apparently in May for some reason, so what am I talking about. *Ding*
"I will give you to the count of three. 1, 2..." Discord begins to say then he makes his black hole appears, causing Geoff to get sucked into it.
"GOOOOOODBBBBBYYYYYE," Geoff screams as he is sucked out of the room before Discord closes the black hole.
"3."
You did that on purpose, Discord. If I were you, I would have just started the count at 3. *Ding!*
Staci is changed back to normal; Discord spoke up, "Any last words?"
"Well..." Staci begins to say but the same hole black hole appears, causing her to scream as she got suck in before it disappeared.
"Never mind! Would've been lies anyhow," Discord laughs cruelly.
Discord is Equestria's Chris. *Ding!*
The unknown horse who hasn't been seen a while stop a moment to rest. He hasn't found his secret weapon...yet. But once the villain does, all will fall...
This will also be relevant later. Everyone will also have forgotten about it by then. *Ding!*
Also, this episode has more references than the "Video Game References" episode of Teen Titans Go. And this one came first, so that makes it two sins in my book. *Ding!* *Ding!*